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Modified Syrian Hamster Time

There are, as far as I know, only three really sad facts about hamsters (which really isn't a lot, considering how much fun they are):

1) Quite a lot of them are used in laboratory experiments.

2) They are the natural prey of virtually anything larger than themselves.

3) They don't live very long. The life expectancy of a Syrian hamster is about 2 years.

To remedy 1) and 2), we can try to keep them 1) out of laboratories, and 2) out of harm's way.

Nothing much can be done about 3), except accepting the fact and trying to be brave about it.

It has been suggested that every 2 weeks should be counted as one "hamster year", but given that they then would be expected to die at the young age of 52, and that it really doesn't fit in with the way they mature, I have come up with the concept of

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Hamster Time

Modified Syrian Hamster Time!

The Modified Syrian Hamster Time simply states that in the first 12 weeks of hamster existence, each week should count as two years. After that, each two weeks should count as one year.

Roughly speaking, this means that:

  • After three months, your hamster will be 25.

  • After half a year, your hamster will be 31.

  • After one year, your hamster will be 44.

  • After two years, your hamster will be 70.

  • After three years, your hamster will be 96.

  • After four years, your hamster will be like one of those Ukranian peasants that only eat Yougurt.

I don't know if this will help us getting over the inevitable, but what the heck. It's worth a try.

So, at the time of writing this, Jane The Hamster is about 34 years old MSHT. Judging by her behaviour so far, this timescale pretty much reflects her "childish innocence" phase, the "teenage tantrum" phase (with extra chewing of cage bars), and the "settling-down-as-young-adult" phase, in which she has become slightly calmer and -- no, you can't really use the phrase "more sophisticated" about a hamster. Somehow, it doesn't work. Not even for Jane!


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