I would argue that owning a hamster must be an excellent alternative to taking mind expanding drugs. (Since I haven't, I really cannot tell for sure. The only thing I know is that with hamsters around, your mind starts to move in new and mysterious ways, and you catch yourself thinking mind-boggling things like the ones presented below.)

So, without further delay, here are the top ten thoughts that never entered my brain before Jane The H entered my life:

10

( OK, so I haven't come up with 10 yet. )

9

In what shoe should I serve dinner today?

8

There is probably no limit to the amount of paper towels you can cram into a 4x4x3 inch box.

7

How can I make myself more popular than my felt-lined boots?

6

Do I have enough carrots in the fridge?

5

I really should have bought an escape-proof couch.

4

Is it safe for someone to climb up the wall behind the radiator and then dive off the top?

3

One slice of cucumber is really quite a lot of food.

2

Will sitting down on the floor in these wide trousers get me into trouble?

1

The Dustbuster is an important technological breakthrough and an indispensable household item.